An article written by Ngcebo Nsimbini reflecting on the Women Emerging leadership journey
When I first encountered Women Emerging leadership Expedition, I expected it to be another leadership course, one that was going to teach me how to communicate better, negotiate and project more authority in my leadership style. What I did not expect was to be asked to look inward before looking outward.
At the heart of the teachings are the Four E’s: Essence, Elements, Expression, and Energy. Together they form a map that helps understand a leader that already lives inside of you. Beginning with Essence, I was asked to examine the pieces of my identity that shape how I lead. My faith, my experience as an environmentalist, my motherness and education that opened doors, I had not always believed were meant for me. I realised, perhaps the first time with such clarity, that being a women leading in a male dominated space is not something I need to shrink or apologise for.
At its core, leadership in itself does not change. Leadership is still about guiding people towards purpose, inspiring action and moving towards a shared goal. What I discovered, however is the fact that the way women lead often looks different and the difference is the advantage.
Using the four E’s framework used to look inward, I was particularly attracted to Essence where Sacred and Education rose to the surface most powerfully in my leadership map at the time. My faith has always guided me to lead with warmth but also firmness, with intuition but also with strategy. In spaces where leadership is expected to look loud and harsh I have always felt the tension between who I am and what the room expects me to be. Essence gave me a language that I always felt I struggle to articulate: my identity is not a liability to be managed; it’s the source of where my leadership flows. This led me to discover one of the significant elements a leader must have. Julia Middleton frames it that “leaders who are not clear on why they lead, will not only struggle to lead others, but will find it hard to lead themselves”.
In practice, essence always shows up in our daily practice of leading. But not all elements of leading serve me well. When that happens, I can Jettison what limits me, reframe what has been mislabelled as weakness and combine what appears to be contradictory. I have spent a significant part of my career in the “good girl” title. Keeping the peace, making myself palatable to spaces that were not designed with me in mind. I was challenged to name these behaviors and began to release it. Jettisoning the good girl condition doesn’t mean abandoning caring for people, it means refusing to let those qualities become instruments of self-erasure.
Reflecting further, what once felt like imposter syndrome – the quiet, persistent belief that I did not belong in rooms I was entering; I now understand it differently. It’s not a feeling of inadequacy. It is a form of humility. Humility is a woman’s greatest leadership strength. It creates spaces of curiosity, learning and the ability to authentically connect with others. Leadership is not built on the need to appear superior, but on the ability to listen, adapt and serve a purpose greater than oneself.
Throughout my journey I have always felt the pressure to choose whether to be strategic or warm; or be visible or humble. I learnt these contractions can be combined and they sit on a sliding scale and are constantly adjusted, rather than being forced to be a binary choice. Leadership does not require me to become less of myself but more deliberate about all of myself showing up.
The idea of combining opposites also resonated deeply. In my line of work, I have often felt pressure to choose to be strategic or be warm; be visible or be humble; be firm or be kind. The Women Emerging framework proposes instead that these apparent contradictions sit on a sliding scale – to be constantly assessed, calibrated, and adjusted – rather than forced into a binary choice. Leadership does not require me to become less myself. It requires me to become more deliberate about how all of myself shows up.
Beyond self-awareness, it is not enough for a leader to hold strong convictions internally. A leader needs to express. Expression is the daily courage to allow leadership to be seen. This can be in how you chair difficult meetings, how you respond to a colleague that is struggling, how we set boundaries without apology and how we speak up in spaces that expect us to be silent. Each leader’s purpose shapes them in a unique way that allows them to balance the demands, to perform, as well as express joy while at it. Therefore, the more we lead from our real, whole selves, the more authentic and effective our leadership is.
As one reflection powerfully states: “Energy will take you to places where competence alone may not. If there is an energy mismatch, you may not be entrusted with leadership- however capable you are.
In many ways energy defines a leader’s presence. Energy is the leader’s arrival in a room, either the ability to extract the air or the ability to breathe life in a room. Energy is so powerful because it rubs on to others. It’s about alignment between who you are and how you show up and that directly changes the course of others
My leadership mask tells a story I could not have articulated at the start of this expedition. At its center sits a lion, deliberate, grounded and unapologetic. Not a lion of dominance and aggression, but the lion of quite authority. The leader who holds pride together not through force but through presence, trust earned overtime and willingness to stand at the front when it matters, and step back when others need to find their own strength. The lion does not need to roar to be heard, it simply shows up consistently. The front part of this mask is what I’m keeping in the leadership journey including how I show up as faith-based leader, ethically modelling, making people feel heard, transferring energy and standing up for my team. The mask also carries things I need to Jettison or leave behind such as taking on too much, fatigue, overcompensation, fear of turbulence and not knowing what to do (crucibles). Reflections from the mask have allowed me to choose what I offer to the world: empathy, collaboration, balanced authority and guidance.
Women emerging did not give me a model to perform. It gave me permission to lead from who I already am, more deliberately, more consciously and this is what I’m taking forward. “I am not a leader for every season” I am a leader this season calls for, rooted in faith, shaped by motherness, energized by purpose and no longer apologizing for the warm I lead with.
About the Author
Ngcebo Nsimbini is a sustainability expert, environmentalist, and impact-driven leader with over ten years of experience in infrastructure development. She leads professionals working to redefine how sustainability is practised and understood within the built environment, with a strong passion for women’s leadership and creating spaces where women can lead authentically and confidently.
Holding a Master’s degree in Sustainability and a Postgraduate Diploma in Business Administration, and currently completing her MBA, Ngcebo’s work sits at the intersection of sustainability, impact investing, and strategic leadership. Her leadership approach is grounded in purpose, human connection, and the belief that sustainable transformation requires both systems thinking and courageous leadership.
