Not Soft, But Strategic: Celebrating the Essence of Motherness in Leading 

There are times in our careers when we speed forward; chasing roles, opportunities, credibility, without once stopping to ask: is this really the way I lead? Varsha Pillai had never asked herself that question. 

“We don’t instinctively think about how we lead, until something forces us to realise that the way we lead doesn’t look like the leadership we have been taught to admire.” says Dr Varsha Pillai, who leads Gender Diversity and Advocacy for Women in Manufacturing at Tata Electronics, India. She was part of the Women Emerging expedition for women leading in India, in partnership with Buzz Women. 

Her conversation with Julia Middleton on the Women Emerging Podcast is a powerful reminder of what happens when we finally take leadership off autopilot and begin leading with intention. 

When the World’s Model Isn’t Yours 

Like many women, Varsha stepped into leading without being asked what her approach should look like. She was expected to fit a template, but her experiences told a different story. Growing up in a matrilineal family, she saw women lead through: 

• responsibility that wasn’t showy 
• vision that wasn’t self-centred 
• strength that wasn’t loud 

On the expedition, Varsha recognised that what fuels her leading is rooted in motherness. Motherness isn’t softness. It is stamina. It is strategy. And importantly, it is not limited to biological motherhood. It is every act of nurturing potential — at home, at work, in society. 

The Intentional Leading  

Varsha believes leading must stop being something women inherit from systems around them — and instead become something they intentionally design. 

• Saying no
• Celebrating progress
• Reminding people of purpose

These aren’t small acts; they are energy practices. They keep us in the work without losing ourselves. Listen to the full conversation with Varsha to hear how leadership shaped by patriarchal norms can be redesigned, why reclaiming motherness is essential to sustaining energy, how letting go becomes an act of generational continuity, and how lived experience — especially women’s — can be a source of confidence rather than doubt. It’s a reminder that your way of leading isn’t an alternative — it is valid, powerful, and absolutely needed. 

About the Author

Kavya Misra is a writer and producer with a background in adfilms and digital content management. Her master’s in English literature forms the foundation for all her creative and corporate projects.  In addition to this, Kavya has an extensive background in theatre. She has written and produced plays. She has also performed at festivals like Bharat Rang Mahotsav by National School of Drama and International Theatre Festival of Kerala. Her diverse experience across theatre, media and digital content reflects her passion for storytelling and production.