182. How to Give Feedback with Monica Medina

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In this episode of the How to Lead – 2025 Edition series, Julia reconnects with Monica Medina after her earlier episode on performance reviews sparked a flood of listener questions. This time, they take on one of the trickiest parts of leading: how to give feedback.

Monica explains why feedback is so hard both for the giver and the receiver and why avoiding it usually makes things worse, not better.

She shares practical tools for leaders who want to give feedback that is fair, constructive, and effective, without damaging trust or relationships. From using phrases like “I’m wondering…” and “Help me understand…” to balancing compliments with areas for growth, Monica offers approaches that keep conversations honest, humane, and actionable.

They also explore how to avoid the common traps: waiting too long, overloading with criticism, making it about yourself, or panicking in silence. Instead, Monica lays out how to structure feedback meetings, how often to hold them, and how to give people a genuine voice in the process.

Listen to this episode to learn how feedback, done thoughtfully, can build trust, spark growth, and strengthen relationships, and in the process strengthen entire organisations.

About the Host

Julia Middleton

Julia Middleton is the host of the Women Emerging podcast and a best-selling author of “If that’s leading, I’m in” as well as two previous books: “Leading beyond Authority” and “Cultural Intelligence”. She is deeply committed to helping people from all backgrounds to find their own approach to leading.

In 2020, Julia launched Women Emerging and in 2022 she lead an expedition of 24 women to find ‘an approach to leading that resonates with women’. She now leads expeditions with women all over the world based on 4Es methodology, discovered in the first expedition.

Prior to that, Julia was founder and, for over thirty years, Chief Executive of Common Purpose, which grew to become one of the biggest leadership development organisations in the world.
Julia is also an Ambassador for the Aurora Prize based in Armenia, on the boards of Alfanar Venture Philanthropy in the Arab World and Equality Now, which operates globally, and on the Advisory Councils of Fundacao Dom Cabral in Brazil and Synapse in Pakistan.

Born in London and brought up in New York, Julia was educated at French Lycées and graduated from the London School of Economics. She is married, with five children and lots of grandchildren.